September 26, 2007

Why?

Why is it that when I get hurt my instinct is to shut down and not deal with the problem rather than just face it head on? Why is it that I get hurt so damned easily?

Why is it that I let myself trust and believe and...hope?

Why is it that I didn't have one single doubt until last night? Why didn't I go in careful and slow and cautious like I have always done?

Why am so quick to rush to judgement, making up my mind before asking a single question? What part of me is so..weak..that I can't say what I mean and ask what I want to know?

What the fuck is wrong with me? I must be slipping.


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jktty at 4:15 p.m.

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