September 21, 2007

When I review the week.

This week has really flown by. On Wednesday I had a bit of confusion and thought it was Tuesday until around lunchtime when someone said it was the "hump of humpday". Once I realized it was in fact Wednesday my day brightened up considerably.

There aren't enough hours in the day to do everything I want to do. I end up borrowing time from my sleeping hours, which means I'm tired and grumpy with alarming frequency. There's a new salesman in my office and he informed me yesterday that he thinks I'm mean!

Me? Mean?? Seriously? Okay maybe I'm a little passive-aggressive, but mean? Puhleeze. Just because I hang up on telemarketers and won't let anyone talk to the general manager unless I'm sure they have an appointment does not make me mean! I'm...efficient. I'm making good use of my bosses time. Okay I'm a little like a Cerberus for my boss, but three headed dogs need love too, ya'll!

I did worry that maybe my bad moods are giving a bad impression to people, so I went to bed earl last night (even though I wasn't all that tired) and got a decent nights sleep. Interestingly enough, I woke up in a great mood. Go figure.

This week at work:

I managed to irritate the morning shift by spraypainting on their paint cart. Hey, they do it all the time! When they do it's always something in spanish, or "[insert name here]is fat" or some crude drawing of female anatomy. Just because I wrote the word "DAYCARE" doesn't mean I'm a bad person. It IS a daycare out there.

Yesterday they spent two hours blowing up two liter bottles with dry ice and water. Today they were having forklift races INSIDE the warehouse. I mean, it's like little boys on HotWheels at a daycare, only it's two-ton forklifts and men old enough to know better.

Even though I think it's insanely stupid and pretty dangerous, it's still funny as hell. I find it a little odd that instead of writing people up for it, the warehouse manager cheers them on, but, whatever.

Is there such a thing as 'too much' customer service? I'm thinking I'm going to send a letter to my eye doctors office.

Dear Dr. FreakyHands,

I really appreciate that you did such a good job examining my eyes. You have no idea how happy I was to try my new glasses on for the first time and realize they were perfect. Overall I think you're really swell.

The week after I got my glasses, that little letter your staff sent was so sweet. The handwritten signature, yours, was an extra special touch. Then, the week after that, the second letter, the one with the magnet with your name on it, and your business card, that was very thoughtful.

But this week, the e-mail. Then, yesterday, the phone call from your office manager. I mean, I'm all for follow-up and maintaining a customer base, but c'mon, this is kinda freaking me out. Your staff kinda reminds me of this guy I went on one date with and I thought he was really great, but then he told his mom I was going to be his wife. It was kinda sweet, but overall just pretty damn scary.

I really don't want to break up with you, Dr. FreakyHands, but this borderline stalking thing is getting a little weird. Cut it out, okay?

Thanks a million. Oh, and I really do love my new glasses!

After I went to the doctor on Monday, I had this vague hope that the disgusting prescription she gave me would make me better. I had this little fantasy that I would take the little magic pill and wake up the next morning feeling just fine. When that didn't happen I put all my hopes on the second pill.

Not only did the tiny little horribly disgusting tablets NOT make me better, I actually think my tongue is worse! Everyone is trying to give me these suggestions. Here's what I've heard so far:

I can do yogurt, but they are talking about the plain, unsweetened kind. C'mon! That's not right. shudders!! I'm doing the acidophilus already. I'll take a pass on the garlic. The vinegar, ummm, nope.

I just want my normal, pretty, pink tongue back. That's really not too much to ask!

Yay for Friday!

jktty at 10:30 a.m.

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